i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
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