So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
farters have to be the big spoon...
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
