Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
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