You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
