I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
