If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
