Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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