Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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