I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
