just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
