ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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