I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize