4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
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I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
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And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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