What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Still dying that you shit outside
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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