I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
