vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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