pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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