Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize