I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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