it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
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