My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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