Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
He better not be in your backpack
how do you play pong handcuffed?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
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