is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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