you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
