I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I skipped work to stalk him.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize