I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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