ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
