I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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