he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize