if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize