omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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