When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Randomize
