Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
