The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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