The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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