conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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