You work out of a Hotel?
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize