Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
