its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
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