i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
So squirting runs in the family.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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