there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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