You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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