She is in my trunk
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
