it was like eating out sand paper
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
