What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
