Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
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