i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
