That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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