here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Houston, we have a blender
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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