i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
