i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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