I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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