Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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