Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
